The Fall

[shadesong]

This icon is an image from the pages of our story in Shooting Star, an image from the Fall.

I keep reiterating that you don't know what the Fall was. The reason I keep reiterating this is because you might be tempted to assume, based on the visuals you get, based on the storybit you just read (if you read it). Those are but parts.

War is terrible.

What they did was orders of magnitude beyond terrible.

You don't condemn a race to death - which is essentially what the gods did to the Dasaroi by revoking their immortality and reducing their powers to this extent - just for discovering war. War is terrible. Rape is terrible. Murder is terrible.

All of these things are horrible, and combined, they are exponentially horrible.

There are things that are worse.

And I won't tell you. There are spoilers that I'll reveal (behind cut-tags, of course), but the Fall isn't one of them. That, no one gets. I don't think Adam knows that one. I'm not sure X'Ana does. That one is revealed in dribs and drabs throughout the series, and you don't even start getting clues for at least a year.

Only two characters know. And one of them - hell, possibly both - is not who you think it is.

This is what you need to know: They Fell, and they died. And they are reincarnated now, throughout long centuries. The gods have turned their faces from them and gone from companion to memory. The Dasaroi have built a city with high walls and mental barriers and named it Lishaya'ra; the name will gently corrupt over time to "Shayara".

Over time, they grow curious about the world beyond their city. They wander among the humans. Over time, many forget who and what they are...

Comments

[dark-blade.livejournal.com]

Mrph. If I were reading this on a page or something of an author I don't know for an upcoming series I'm looking forward to, I'd be miffed. "Fine then, be that way." *cue walk off*

But then, I'm in an odd mood today, and it's a bit snarky.

Are you interested in the actual comment reply I had before my brain kicked in and went "Dude, shut up. That's Song."?


I hate ending questions with a quote that has another punctuation inside, it always looks odd...

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

Yes, interested!

I'm a little tense about the Fall, is all; I just want to be Absolutely Sure that people don't think I'm making mountains out of things that could be perceived, in perspective, as molehills.

[dark-blade.livejournal.com]

Ok. Mind, this might be somewhat due to crankiness, but my immediate reaction was as follows:

Ok... so we don't get it. If we think we get it we are wrong. The almighty author knows, but it is such that not even her husband, not even her fellow creator the artist gets it. We don't get to know. If we're good, we'll get little dribbles of hint, but not for a long time. And then, it'll still be wrong! *cue evil laughter from somewhere* "Haha, I know! You don't!" Uhm.. yeah. Fuck off.

Which is the point I caught up with mmyself and went "ACK!" Going back through again and peering around my current mood filter, I think it still reads a bit smug, rather than trying to make sure people get it.

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

Hm. I am very likely being overly hamfisted, then....

[dark-blade.livejournal.com]

On the flip side, I'm not as cranky now.. I hadn't realized just where all my mood had gone until I caught myself and went o_O Do you realize that's your friend Song you're about to tell off? WTF did she do to deserve THAT? Which initiated a full stop and inventory.

*huggles*

~Stressy Rin

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

Glad to help curb the mood! *giggle* *hug*

Addendum:

[dark-blade.livejournal.com]

"I keep reiterating that you don't know what the Fall was. The reason I keep reiterating this is because you might be tempted to assume, based on the visuals you get, based on the storybit you just read (if you read it)."

and

"And I won't tell you. There are spoilers that I'll reveal (behind cut-tags, of course), but the Fall isn't one of them. That, no one gets. I don't think Adam knows that one. I'm not sure X'Ana does. That one is revealed in dribs and drabs throughout the series, and you don't even start getting clues for at least a year."

These too parts and the way they are written set the tone for the rest of the post, and took higher registry than the most important parts, like the last 2 paragraphs and the overall message of "This thing is major hugeymongous bad."

[rubian77.livejournal.com]

Man, you give me shivers.

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

Thank you, hon....

[spc476.livejournal.com]

What they did was orders of magnitude beyond terrible.

Who are “they?” The gods? The Dasaroi? It's not quite clear who was doing the stuff orders of magnitude beyond terrible. And as dark_blade has already commented, it comes across as “neener neener neener” which didn't sit right with me. And makes me think you are making a mountain out of a molehill.

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

The Dasaroi.

*laugh* Okay, okay, this all needs rephrasing. It's not meant to be Professional Writing, it's just me babbling.

[jnanacandra.livejournal.com]

I have to agree with dark_blade. Give your readers credit for a little imagination! Rather than "you can't know how bad it was", perhaps word it along the lines of "Think of the worst thing you can. Now make it worse. It was even more terrible than that."

Not to mention telling us that we won't get it for at least a year - I don't mind that there are things we won't find out for that long, but maybe don't play it up so much. It's hard enough waiting for the first issue to show up!

(Criticism aside, I adore Shayara, and everything you've shown us for it. More! More!)

[zeyr.livejournal.com]

There seems to be an interesting dichotomy in this. It is half "wanna, gotta, haveta SHARE!!!! *bounce* *bounce*" and half "You need some context here, what can I give you without ruining the story...hmmm..okay, but I need to clarify that I'm holding stuff back".

And your mentioning that Adam and X'ana don't know, while it comes off to some as being snarky and superior, seems more an apology. "These two crucial people to my/Shayara's existence don't know...so don't feel bad that I'm not telling you either...it isn't that I don't like you!!!".

However, all of the reasonable interpretations come via the "we know 'song" filter. :) However, this is an outpouring of blah in your journal, so we all do tend to know 'song here. ;)

Kelyn

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

Yes!!! Exactly. That is what's going on in my brainmeats regarding this. Thank you!

[dandelion-diva.livejournal.com]

My ghods that was beautiful. (Even your teasers are beautiful! Wow.:) And I didn't think it would be possible for me to want to read your stuff more. Who knew? :)

Gessi