Okay. So.

[shadesong]

Caution: this is a Shayara-related post. If you're sick of me nattering on about my comic book, go 'way now.

So. Most of you have seen the preview comic Mouse and I did for MegaCon. And I was originally going to start issue #1 the night after issue #0, with Kieran calling Council. But I think the direction I'm going in is this:

Issue #1: Shawn arrives in town. He's taken the bus cross-country from Jason's compound (which needs a better name than "Jason's compound", btw), where he's spent the last 7 years (he overstayed a bit due to his unusual abilities). So. "Voiceover" in the bus, as he scribbles in his journal. First time visiting Shayara - he's spent years studying it, now it's time to leave the nest and go live, and what better place than the ancestral home of his people? So bus gets there, he beholds the majesty of the city gates and whatnot -

-and that's where I'm having trouble, as I'm writing this like a novel, and I don't want to get into him marveling at the age of the gates and the fossils in the cobblestones, because Mouse already knows all of that and will draw it. So I just wanna skip ahead to -

- him arriving at the coffeehouse as Donna's talking to Kieran and Ryan - the conversation that happened at the end of issue #0. He doesn't overhear, but he recognizes Donna, and goes to talk to her after the boys leave. Tells her who he is, she "reads" him and sees that he's for real, and invites him to the Council meeting, explaing things in brief, but not telling him the direct purpose of the meeting (not avoiding it, just not mentioning it. Yes, there's a reason for that.), and he agrees to go. End with Shawn, alone, coffeeshop, sunset, musing, journal voiceover to close the issue.

That work as an intro, y'all think?

Comments

[m0usegrrl.livejournal.com]

1) a name for Jason's compound -- the Homestead? Haven? Hole In The Wall?

2) go ahead and describe Shawn's wonderment at Shayara!! it'll help me draw it better. write about the fossils in the cobblestones so i can draw him examining them. tell me what he notices. does he touch the gates as he enters the city -- do flakes of ages-old rust come off on his fingers? can he feel the weight of millennia in the place? i need to know this stuff!

3) this sounds perfect as an intro. =) Shawn's our "eyes" into Shayara -- we marvel and learn and watch with him.

[and yes, i know i have to finish inking the ashcan... =) i'll update the website too with what we got so far. maybe this'll help me get over my creative slump. oooh, character bio snippets!! send me some more so i can post them!]

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

1. Bob! No. I dunno.

2. Okay. Definitely touches the gates. He's Tamrani, so he's empathic - we'll need to visually convey that he's moving amidst tides of emotions like he never has before. Much wonderment. We'll have to journal-voiceover that, too.

3. Good! Issue #2 will be the meeting.

And yes, ink, and put it on the web in a flippy format so it's easier to read, and what characters do you want bios of? You have Donna and Kieran. I can give you Ryan. You have a working bio of Shawn, but it's not for the public, really. Any sketches of him yet?

[alfheimr.livejournal.com]

1) Why is everyone first instinct to always name things Bob? It's got to be a gamer's disease.

Namaste - would be cool for the name: "We are One" *Shrug*

2) skipping the entrance into the city would be kind of jarring I'd think. Leave most readers with a sense of... how'd he get HERE/

3

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

1. It is. Seriously. I hear "Bob", I get giggly.

2. Oh, I didn't mean I'd actually skip him entering - just skip the description and just stick in a stage-direction thing for mousegrrl, like "he sees the gates, he's all in awe and stuff, walks through the street, marvel left and right, gets to the coffeehouse."

[iroshi.livejournal.com]

See, when I hear people name things "Bob", I think Titan A.E. But then, my daughter has made me watch that I-don't-know-HOW-many times. ^_^

And I suspect it hails back to the Church of Bob. But that might be because I hung out on a chatboard with some Bobbers, back when you actually had to dial in to a BBS. Oooooh big sister is oooooooold!

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

Yes, with me it's the Church-of-Bob thing - I'm not a Bobber, but I know many!

I seriously need to get Titan A.E. I'm not sure if my daughter's old enough for it, but *I* liked it!

Re:

[iroshi.livejournal.com]

Well, my youngest was 3 when it came out, and HE loved it. (And the 4-yo, and the then-6-yo...who turns 8 in a few weeks and it's STILL her favourite movie!)

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

She just watched Harry Potter, and Titan AE is probably no scarier than that.... we need to pick it up! Elayna's 7.

[phantom_wolfboy]

That would be the Church of the Subgenius, unless I'm mistaken.

You people are sooo pink. ;-)

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

I knew that, bitch. :P Was just using the same phrase she used...

Re:

[alfheimr.livejournal.com]

You know I was hoping you'd find your way here - I think you'll like here - she's pwetty....

did I just say pwetty? *hides face in hands* I'm such a fag sometimes. LOL Ah well.

Re:

[iroshi.livejournal.com]

Sometimes? ::incredulous look::

And I don't know if she's pretty, dammit, she only has drawings for icons! Heh...I should talk...

She seems nice, though, yeah. Got a new friend added. And as IF my brother would mention somebody shibby in his journal and I *wouldn't* go look and add a comment or two, even if I didn't decide to add a friend?

[deza.livejournal.com]

She's not pretty. At all. She's drop-dead gorgeous. And talented.

[stronae.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I also get the Titan AE flashback. I don't know the Bobbers, but I do remember the good ol' BBS days. Hell, I'm just thrilled to see someone else remember them, too. Nostalgia and all. :)

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

"When I was your age, there was no Internet! BBSes. In the snow. Uphill both ways."

[crimmycat.livejournal.com]

eh, consisdering I ran a gaming convention once with a discordian as my right-hand man, and our theme ended up being "the five bunny slippers of the apocalypse! War, Death, Famine, Pestilance, and Bob!"

I agree with the gamer's disease. How many people outside of gamers and uber-geeks are in the church of the subgenius?

Though when I think "Bob", I think of my friend Jennifer, one of 5 so named on her floor her freshman year. When people started getting confused, the geeks cracked "Can we call you Bob?" And three years later, some of them have a hard time remembering that isn't her real name.

[m0usegrrl.livejournal.com]

yeh, a bio for Ryan would be good. i'll dig up Shawn's description and try to scribble up a sketch of him. ooh, maybe more descriptions of the Houses too, like the one for Tarak that's in the ashcan! i think Lhri'nahr and Narsan would be the most appropriate, on account of Kieran and Ryan...

i'll start working on the website, and try inking more pages -- last page i inked i did such a shitty job on i'm gonna have to redraw the entire thing from scratch. [moral: never ink when you're stressed, depressed, or otherwise unable to Empty Your Mind and focus.] and of course, it's the scene i've had the most difficulty getting correct. maybe i'll turn that into a two-page spread...

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

That last page, is it the one with the surviving members of the Talthar Kithrayna looking out over the wasteland? That should *definitely be a two-pager, with them on the left...

[m0usegrrl.livejournal.com]

that'd be the one...

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

Oooh, yay! Scan it the very minute you're done? And I really really want to see pics of Shawn, and of Julia in her court garb. *bounce* *bounce* Did you see my invitation in your journal?

Where are the other ones?

[sambear.livejournal.com]

I looked for your other Shayara posts, and found none. Where are they?

Re: Where are the other ones?

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

They weren't explicitly labeled as such - I'll dig around and find them! :)

[deza.livejournal.com]

Name that compound C-4. Or is that already taken? *giggle*

Yep, I definitely need to go home soon...

[technomom]

Okay, look - ask sambear what a total bitch I am about not getting ALL of a story. Preferably without interruptions. So now you gotta get this stuff written and drawn and published and so on, or I'll get really grumpy.

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

*salute* Yes, ma'am! :) mousegrrl and I are working on it.....







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