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I'm finally starting to accept that my body is just more sensitive than most people's. I'm medically fragile, no matter how SuperTuff I want to be.
Wrapping too many gifts in that hunched-over position sets me to whimpering as I lie back and let my back "relax"; credit the wilderness survival camp I spent my junior year in, and their refusal to give me a pack frame that they were legally obligated to give me, as my pack weighed over 25% of my body weight - the place was closed down a few years after I left because they killed kids.
If there is a cold or flu bug going around, I will catch it. It will go straight to my lungs and I will be horribly ill and develop bronchitis or an upper respiratory infection; credit childhood asthma and two hospitalizations due to pneumonia, one lung collapse (age 8).
I get sinus infections at least twice a year. This one's my fault for sticking corrosive chemicals up my nose the whole time I was in Vegas. Damn death wish.
When I get sick, I can't move. I can barely get from the bed to the couch without collapsed and weeping in anger and frustration.
I'm tiny; I never hit 5 feet. The things that would be an inconvenience to a robust 5'5"-and-up person incapacitate me.
I am sick of people nagging me to go to bed early because if gods forbid I stay up past 11 my brain will misfire at me. I'm sick of not having control over so many parts of my body, but that one the most. I get so angry post-seizure because my brain will not work the way it's supposed to.
Right now - could be worse. Right now it's just the pain radiating from my mid-to-lower back down through my legs, the mild fever, and the shitty shitty cramps that come with the first day of my period. But still.
Wrapping too many gifts in that hunched-over position sets me to whimpering as I lie back and let my back "relax"; credit the wilderness survival camp I spent my junior year in, and their refusal to give me a pack frame that they were legally obligated to give me, as my pack weighed over 25% of my body weight - the place was closed down a few years after I left because they killed kids.
If there is a cold or flu bug going around, I will catch it. It will go straight to my lungs and I will be horribly ill and develop bronchitis or an upper respiratory infection; credit childhood asthma and two hospitalizations due to pneumonia, one lung collapse (age 8).
I get sinus infections at least twice a year. This one's my fault for sticking corrosive chemicals up my nose the whole time I was in Vegas. Damn death wish.
When I get sick, I can't move. I can barely get from the bed to the couch without collapsed and weeping in anger and frustration.
I'm tiny; I never hit 5 feet. The things that would be an inconvenience to a robust 5'5"-and-up person incapacitate me.
I am sick of people nagging me to go to bed early because if gods forbid I stay up past 11 my brain will misfire at me. I'm sick of not having control over so many parts of my body, but that one the most. I get so angry post-seizure because my brain will not work the way it's supposed to.
Right now - could be worse. Right now it's just the pain radiating from my mid-to-lower back down through my legs, the mild fever, and the shitty shitty cramps that come with the first day of my period. But still.
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