(no subject)

[shadesong]

Every time I pause to write here, I ponder, and I think "my thoughts on that are not complete yet".

Which, from the outside, must look like absence when it's more like heightened presence.

So. This post is an ask-me-anything, in case there's anything you were wondering about.

Anonymous commenting is on.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Do the foster care people know that you are polyamorous?

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

Yes, although that may be irrelevant due to my recent medical discoveries. We have to give a lot of thought to whether we can go forward on fostering, given that we now know there's a possibility of my sudden death. Kids in foster care are already traumatized, y'know?

[farceur-rouge.livejournal.com]

How did you know Adam was Your Person? I know you've got a post about this somewhere, but I can't track it down.

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

Hm. I don't know if I have a specific post about this! It was a gradual thing.

We met on Tamson House, the Charles de Lint listserv, in late '95/early '96, and we were just... instant best friends. Because we were both smart and snarky in ways that clicked with each other. We started e-mailing offlist almost right away. But the thing was that both of us were like "Oh man, they are too funny and clever and awesome, there's no way they'd be into me." So we settled into best-friendship with a strong undercurrent of undisclosed crush.

And then I met this other guy in person and dated him and married him and on our honeymoon we went to DisneyWorld and Atlanta, because we both had close friends in Atlanta - he had a college buddy, and I had Adam and another Tamson House person.

And Adam walked into the hotel room and the clouds parted and a chorus of angels sang and I thought "I have made a terrible mistake."

But I didn't tell him! Because what would that have accomplished? But from then on Adam visited me in Florida a few times a year, and I consoled him (as a friend) through a big breakup, and we tried to keep from falling in love and totally failed at that.

And then my ex-husband did stuff that made him my ex-husband, and we were like fuck this, let's admit it: we are in love, we are best friends, this is what life should be.

And I moved to Atlanta.

And Adam was my second-best decision of all time, right after having Elayna. (#3: Moving to Boston.)

Basically, he was my Person from day one. It just took a while to peel everything away from that essential fact.

Arisia

[(Anonymous)]

What Arisia panels are you most looking forward to?

Re: Arisia

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

Ugh, this sounds awful, but I have to be honest: none of them, right now? The track-manager stuff has been very stressful this year; we were told that we were getting more programming rooms/slots, but in fact we got fewer, so a lot of great stuff isn't running, and I'm really frustrated about that.

Re: Arisia

[drwex]

Yeah, I was wondering about that. I saw my prelim list and I wondered "hmm, what didn't make it."

Re: Arisia

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

We lost the entire wing by the Starbucks on the ground floor.

Re: Arisia

[drwex]

Oh geezus. That's... gonna be interesting

Re: Arisia

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

YEP.

Re: Arisia

[(Anonymous)]

In fairness, Program is getting the four new big rooms on the lobby level on the Galleria side. I think the room-count change is mostly driven by the decision *not* to run programming in projected-media rooms, which we did do last year.

Re: Arisia

[aelscha.livejournal.com]

Whoops, that was me, not logged in. Sorry!

Re: Arisia

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

Yeah, but we did lose more rooms than we got, and we were all given fewer slots.

[rubian77.livejournal.com]

Thank you for checking in. :)

Since you've been in a few... well, let's just say "bad" relationships, and considering your current health situation, are you now more cautious about entering into new relationships, or less tolerant of unacceptable behavior?

Also, how are your furbabies doing? :)

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

I am a lot more guarded, yeah. This goes into those thoughts that aren't quite fully-formed yet! But there have been a lot of deliberate choices and evaluations about relationships since Judah and Michael & Lynne.

Bash's eye is healing steadily, and all other furbabies are doing very well indeed. I should do a picture post.

[(Anonymous)]

You've mentioned in passing Elayna having a girlfriend. This is a GIRLFRIEND girlfriend, not just a girl friend? Did I miss a post about E coming out? Were you surprised?

Also please forgive this next one but whatever became of Spooky and Docorion? I have checked in on you a few times since then but that was around when I stopped LiveJournal.

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

Oh wow you are operating on a 2005 operating system.

As far as I know, they are both quite happy with other people and I am quite happy without them!

Elayna came out in middle school; I was unsurprised. She fluctuates from lesbian to bi to pan.

Also I moved to Boston, which was my third best decision ever (after having Elayna and starting up with Adam). Also I have a writing career now and stuff. A lot has changed.

[moonfire77.livejournal.com]

I don't recall your having written about your epilepsy lately; forgive me if I just didn't catch it, but where do things stand on that front?

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

Mostly good lately! We think the strange motor activity in early October that was seizurelike but without altered consciousness was a result of hypotension.